Team selection:

Gary “Gaz” Weaver (c)
Andy “Toes” Moore (wk)
Matt “Presh” Perrett
Joel “needs a nickname” Oliver
Tom “Doghouse” Ellis
Mike “Pendo” Pendleton
Mike “Puddles” Leonard
Christian “Jimmy” Saville
Chris “Wino” Maynard
Simon “Kermit” Hendry
Damien “Damo” Wheatley

The Match Report

After a very close loss to Farningham on the season's opening fixture, there had been a week lost to weather before Tatsfield headed to Kemsing CC for what was a new fixture on the calendar.

Arrival at the club revealed a fairly steeply sloping pitch with a nicely manicured square and a fairly lush outfield but, more importantly, glorious sunshine bathing the meadow-like scene.

With Gaz running a little late, Presh was called up for tossing duty, called incorrectly, and Tatsfield were asked to bat first on a pitch that looked understandably tacky given the shocking weather that has plagued pitch preparation across the country so far this year.

A conspicuous absence of willing volunteers to open the batting was filled by Toes stepping up to number 1, with Presh accompanying him out to the middle.

The young Kemsing bowlers immediately hit their lengths, and it wasn’t long before the accurate female opening bowler induced a hack across the line from Toes, which saw the ball clatter into his stumps for a duck.

Joel was next to the crease, and he initially looked secure before a leg-side delivery from the other opening bowler tailed a little down the hill and clipped his leg stump via a small (but ‘cheeky’) deflection; Joel making way for 1.

A short while later, Presh followed him back to the pavilion, also for 1, middling a drive from the female bowler just to the right of mid-off who took a fine catch above his head.

Woes were further compounded when Pendo failed to lay bat on another good delivery from the very next ball, departing for a golden quacker (apparently his first ever in cricket, so welcome to the Primary Club Mike!).

Tatsfield were really struggling to adapt both to the accuracy of the bowling and also the two-paced nature of the pitch, with balls having a tendency to stop in the wicket with the result that timing was very difficult to achieve. At 8-4 from the first 10 overs, things were looking decidedly unfavourable.

Fortunately, a decent partnership then ensued as Puddles dropped anchor (after a large swish first ball!) whilst Doghouse got himself in, and then started to accelerate. Puddles eventually departed to a sharp catch at extra cover from one of the first deliveries he really attacked and middled, falling for 6 just after the drinks break. This brought Gaz to the crease in an unaccustomed position of number 7, and he admitted to being more than a little nervous facing his first deliveries after the sparkly diamond duck of the last game. Meanwhile, Doghouse was, as usual, particularly dismissive of anything to the leg side, and a few massive sixes rained down towards the clubhouse as he found his range. He was fortunate to be dropped on the midwicket boundary in the 20s, but made the most of that life to post a valuable 48, falling finally to a catch well held right on the boundary rope as he attempted to clear it yet again.

Jimmy was next to the crease, and he looked solid until he too, was undone by getting through a shot too early, departing caught for 2.

Wino was next in, and with 12 overs to go and the score at 70-7, Gaz’s first priority was survival to bat out the overs and see what score we could post.

Happily, Gaz had started to find some confidence and managed to get a handle on the pace of the wicket leading to some glorious cover drives to the boundary and some lovely straight lofted drives as well.

At the other end, Wino poked, prodded, and generally tried to rotate the strike with offside drives and legside nudges.

Some hard running in and amongst Gaz’s increased fluency saw the partnership blossom, with Gaz passing his 50 with a couple of overs left, and going on to a superb unbeaten 57*. Wino finished 11*, and Tatsfield had somehow scrambled to a more than respectable 148-7 from their 35 overs.

Tea was sadly not provided, but after a quick refreshment break, Tatsfield took to the field expecting Kemsing to come hard at them but knowing that a disciplined bowling and fielding performance could be enough to defend the target of 149.

Kermit and Presh were quickly on the money, with Kermit the beneficiary of a great catch at mid-off from Damo, who did a lovely little dance before clinging on safely.

Presh was unlucky not to make a breakthrough as his changes of pace frequently induced miss-timed shots from the batsmen, with the ball somehow landing safely every time.

Wino (4-1-8-1) came on next, and his first ball was glanced to fine leg where Damo rushed in, scooped the ball up and demolished the stumps with a bullet throw to leave the non-striker (who had in fairness called the run) well short of his ground. This effectively completed a team hat-trick from Wino’s bowling, after the two wickets from his last two balls in the preceding game.

In his fourth over, Wino made the next breakthrough, finding some uneven bounce to get one through the defences of the batsman to castle his middle stump.

Damo bowled quickly and accurately in his initial spell and was unlucky to go wicketless in his first few overs with several gorgeous deliveries proving too good for the batsmen.

Joel (5-1-13-0) came on and bowled very economically, with good flight and dip, and was very unlucky not to pick up any wickets, with a tough stumping chance and a few aerial shots that just evaded the field.

Puddles (2-0-10-1) was called into action next, and he broke the partnership as Damo took another good catch at mid-off from yet another mis-timed drive that the batsman was through a fraction early.

Jimmy (4-0-12-1) struck with his very first ball, jagging one back at good pace to pin the resilient number 3 LBW for 19 (Kemsing’s top score) and maintained a good speed and accuracy for the remainder of his spell, including several that zipped past the outside edge into the gloves of Toes behind.

As it became clear that Kemsing were slowly falling further behind the required rate, Gaz even gave himself a bowl, with his tweakers yielding economical figures of 3-0-6-0.

With the required rate approaching 10 an over, Gaz called back his strike bowlers to see out the game.

Presh (6-1-18-1) was immediately into the action, with a regulation caught and bowled as the combination of an off-pace delivery and the sluggish nature of the pitch conspired to cause the batsman to chip back a simple return catch.

Presh was then called into action in the field, taking a fine catch from Damo’s bowling at mid wicket, having initially thought that the ball was going to go over his head before belatedly realising that he had to dive forward to catch it. Damo thoroughly deserved his wicket and finished with excellent figures of 5-0-14-1.

It was left to Kermit to see out the overs, and he was indebted to Doghouse taking a good catch from a ball which couldn’t fairly be described as anything other than a pie, but which the batsman only managed to hit straight at a fielder. Kermit finished with fine figures of 6-2-15-2, as Kemsing fell just under 50 runs short of their target.

A really good all-round performance from Tatsfield, with tidy fielding, and no dropped catches which is (as regular followers of these reports will know) a rarity. Particular mentions must go to Toes (for just a single bye on a pitch that was difficult to keep on), Joel for outstanding energy and efficiency in the field, Puddles for some excellent diving stops as well as some fancy footwork, and also to Damo for two good catches, a superb run-out and general enthusiasm in the field.

Kemsing were a predominantly young but talented and enthusiastic side, and the game was played in an excellent spirit. We would be delighted to welcome them to Furze for a reciprocal fixture and look forward to visiting them again next season.

Wino.